


Three Paradoxes

by CianRhapsody



Series: Three Paradoxes AU [1]
Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Alternate Universe, Bill Uses a time wish, Growing up the same time as the Stans, It doesn't go as he expected, M/M, Romance, Teen Angst
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-05-14
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2019-05-06 21:46:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,621
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14656863
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CianRhapsody/pseuds/CianRhapsody
Summary: Time Wishes almost never work as you plan. Too bad Bill Cipher didn't know that when he used one to escape Stan's Burning Mindscape.He finds himself growing up at the same Time as the Stans, just another human. Of course, that's temporary.As for Stanley, one good deed sparks a whirlwind of inescapable but pleasant weirdness





	Three Paradoxes

**Author's Note:**

> Cheerful Nihilist - Bill Cipher
> 
> Selfless Egotist - Stanley Pines
> 
> Scientific Occultist - Stanford Pines
> 
> (Hey guys, would you rather have short chapters more often or longer chapters less often? I have no one to bounce ideas off or beta of at the moment which means transitions are a struggle. So I could just do scenes as chapters as 1-1.5k words a chapter or head/wall and try for 3-4k but take a week and a half or more. The overall plot is outlined, it's just making it all fit together just right)

Bill Cipher see’s Stanley’s mindscape burning to cinders around them both and panics. He has only one way out… He pulls a Time Wish he stole when he went after Time Baby from under his top hat. And he wishes for his fate at the hands of the Pines family to change. He wakes up, born into a human body, the same year as the Stans, with no memories or powers.  
~~~~~~~~~~  
The first day at a new school is always the hardest. William “Bill” Cipher had learned this after being tossed around for 7 years. Glass Shard High seemed no different, though it certainly was poorer than the others. He was dressed in a snappy gold ensemble, button down shirt, silk vest, pinstripe pants and his usual bow tie, wanting to make a good impression. It seems to do the opposite however. After leaving class for lunch, he finds himself being shoved against a locker by a Neanderthal, his possessions knocked to the ground and scattered on the floor. “So we have a new freak in school huh? First it was six fingers, now it’s one eye.”  
Bill snorts derisively, eyebrow rising. “So, you’re one of those unevolved ape men who’s scared of a little weirdness?” He can’t help himself. And that turns out to be a mistake.  
Crampelter pulls Bill forward only to slam him back against the metal doors, hard. His left hand wraps around Bill’s throat as the other is pulled back for a punch. “You got quite a mouth on you, rich bitch…”  
Bill makes a gurgling sound, eye widening. So, this is the land of physical violence. Good to know. He tries to pry the fingers open as he gets lightheaded.  
“Hey Crampelter! I’m gonna knock your block off if you don’t scram right now,” calls a gruff voice from down the hall. There’s the sound of approaching footsteps and the bully, having ignored the warning gets cold cocked in the side of the head, forcing him to let go of Bill.  
Bill sinks to his knees, taking deep breaths. “You have excellent timing stranger…” He flashes a weak smile, working to gather his things and get air into his screaming lungs.  
“Stanley Pines. I’m used to dealing with that prick… You okay new kid?”  
“Better now certainly,” he nods, picking his things up. “Bill Cipher, pleased to meet you Stanley.” He holds out his hand.  
Stan looks at it for a few seconds before shaking it. “Come on, let’s get to lunch before it ends.” The two walk together, though Stanley pauses in front of a classroom, waving through the window at a nearly identical teen, though with the addition of a chin dimple. Stanford waves back, though definitely shoots a curious look at the cafe au lait skinned blonde behind Stanley. “My smart guy twin. Any one who messes with him and his extra fingers answers to me."  
“His hands are quite unique. It’s too bad mouth breathers don’t appreciate the unusual and interesting...” Bill chirps cheerfully behind him.  
"Sixer is great when he remembers other people exist and to talk..." But he can't help his  jealousy because Stanford is, in his mind, smart and important but he himself isn't.   
So his twin is a sore spot Bill immediately notices. Too bad, they're an interesting set. He pauses and smacks himself on the forehead. "By the by, thank you for stopping that loafing buffoon earlier Stanley. I'm sorry I entirely forgot my manners," Bill’s grin is that of a dangerous beast, but not one to bite the hand that came to his aid.  
Stanley’s expression becomes quizzical for a moment before he returns to a more neutral expression. He’s not used to being thanked for much of anything. “You’re welcome I guess. It was nothing,” a facade of bravado to cover a rush of giddiness. “So… Why aren’t you in some fancy pants school? You talk like Sixer and dress like the Monopoly man, your parents have to have dough.".  
The question catches the Blond off guard for a moment, but then he shrugs, deciding 'What the hell'. "A lot of kids who live the Richie Rich life think like that idiot you handled. They don't like the unusual and interesting. When it wasn't my eye they used it was my sexu--- Something else," he hesitates, fidgeting with his bow tie. Not a good idea to paint that particular target on his back. "Long story short, six schools have expelled me for self defense."  
  
“What a load. If they start shit, you should be allowed to finish it,” Stanley shakes his head. They get to the lunchroom and Stan heads to a table in the corner beckoning for Bill to follow. “Here, they mostly don’t care, just keep it out of sight of teachers.” He sits, pulling out a meager paper bag lunch. An apple, milk, and a ham and cheese Sandwich with no mayo. Great. Ma’s stupid diet has to ruin food for everyone in the family.  
“I can do that with ease!” Bill chuckles, pulling out his lunch box. He sees the lack of substance in his Acquaintance's meal and pulls out a baggie of oreos, pushing half of them over to Stan. “Nobility should reap some sort of reward, I hope cookies are alright.”  
Stan looks over at him. “You don’t owe me nothin Bill.”  
“I think you forget there’s a chance, no matter how slim, that he could have killed me. I was on the borderline of passing out when you punched him.” There are already bruises forming on his throat, thankfully covered by the high collar, and his back aches where it hit the lockers. “So, let me at least do something.”  
That pauses Stanley for a minute. He hadn’t actually thought about the danger in the moment. But, to a degree, he had to accept Bill was right. “Fine. I can accept them as a fee for heroism.” He pulls the pile of oreos over, eating them with gusto.  
Bill systematically pulls his cookies apart, cleaning up the cream with his tongue before moving to the cookies themselves. “Excellent. I don’t do charity Stanley. So no need to let your pride be damaged over a snack.”  
“...You know, for having one eye you sure as hell can see a lot...” The fact that with so little context and having only just met, Bill could pick out his concern surprised him. He looks at the blonde, a little put off by the nearly erotic way he’s eating.  
“You asked for no reward for the help and had to think about shaking my hand. Little things but the meaning is clear. The wealth gap makes you uncomfortable. Given my experiences with the upper class, I don’t care how much or how little money you have. My parents can care about that. I don’t see the point of believing I’m better than because my parents have money. Money is a meaningless method of controlling the Plebians.”  
“… Uh. English Bow Tie?” Stanley raises an eyebrow, attacking his sandwich.  
“I want to be recognized for my own actions, not the wealth or position of my family. And money is just worthless paper which you can use buy things with actual value. Like Gold,” Bill shrugs and speed eats the rest of his lunch before resting his elbows on the table.  
“Try tellin’ my ma or Pops that. Money is their whole world...”  
“That’s too bad. I guess you have to have it to see past the illusion…” He halts in his rambling a moment. “You have problems with your parents too?”  
“Mostly with Pops. He’s a cold bastard with unreachable standards...” Stan huffs. “The only good thing he ever did for me was put me in boxing..”  
“You took to it like Godzilla to Tokyo, if that punch you threw was any example. It sounds like he and my mother would get along swimmingly though...”  
The two chat their way through lunch in a similar manner until the bell. It turns out they have a few classes together, so they sit in the back, Bill taking meticulous notes and Stanley pointing everyone out and telling Bill the bits of gossip he knows about each of them. It’s almost like having a friend.  
Finally the day is over and Stanley waves at Bill before heading to find Stanford at his locker so they can walk home. “Hey Ford!” He puts his twin in a light headlock with a playful grin.  
“Hello to you too Stanley,” Ford chuckles awkwardly. “Almost ready to go. I heard you had a run in with Crampelter earlier. You okay?”  
“I’m good. I was the puncher, not the punchee, so it went well. He was being an ass so I put him in his place,” Stan looks almost proud, letting Stanford go.  
“Does it have something to do with the guy who was behind you in the hall?” Ford blurts out without thinking. He’d been wondering all day what the deal with that was.  
“Yeah actually it does. When I came onto the scene, ol’ dick for brains was throttling him and harassing himself for having only one eye. He doesn’t care if it’s too many or not enough... I couldn’t watch that, so I did something about it. Blondy’s name is Bill and he’s definitely weird, but doesn’t seem like a bad guy. Actually, you’d like him I think Sixer, he’s pretty smart but not all superior about it.”  
“That’s high praise coming from you Stanley,” Ford replies somewhat dumbfounded, shouldering his backpack. “I don’t think I have heard you say anything nice about anyone else ever...”  
“Not like many people here give me reasons to,” Stan fires back.


End file.
